Decided

I'm guessing the lack of news should be an indicator. I told Melody I've decided.

But have i really? I dunno. You all know i'm soft-hearted. But the more I read Karen's blog.. the places they've gone to, the things they've done. It'll always haunt me. Now I don't even wanna go Disney anymore, much less with him.

Somehow I wanna believe him. That it's not love anymore. Which makes it worse. Cos then i'm fighting with memories. And i can't win. Cos it took a lot of time, opportunities and effort to make memories. And the beautiful thing bout them is that memories get beautified over time. Hurt and pain deadens, all things good flourish.

I was thinking to do it on Friday after he lands. I will go to the airport and hide 1 corner and see for myself. Then go to his place and settle things. But i'm afraid he'll be tired. But then again i'm more afraid he won't call me at all. So i guess I'd have to strike before I'm struck right? =(

I'm curious if he got me the Tivoli. Cos i have this pic of Tivoli on my desktop. Maybe he saw when he used my PC. But that doesn't matter anymore. If this is where we end I won't take it. It's just not me. And it's just not mine. I told Hermann several times that I can't lose what I never had.

I'm tired. I'm packing all my flights back to back. So that I won't think too much. And.. I know my direct Taipei is just after his. And we'll prolly handover. Will just keep it to myself. Will keep quiet bout the SQ28 also. I just wanna quietly make my exit.